How Do I Break Routine?
Here's the short answer: I don't. Here's the long answer. I have dogs and a toddler, two of the most routine oriented life forms on God's green Earth. For years, pre-Ben, when Linda got home, she'd go upstairs and wash her face. A long day as a technical writer makes a woman sweaty, and she always liked to wash the workday from her visage before continuing her day. QE's are lazy bastards, and barely break a sweat, so there was no need for face washing from me. That and I'm just a filthy, filthy animal. Because the dogs were so used to making that trip up to the bedroom with her, now, when she comes home, they will be all sorts of agitated and upset until she goes upstairs. Even if she doesn't plan on washing up, or doesn't need to change, she'll still go upstairs, just to come right back down, so that the dogs have their routine.
The boy isn't much better. It doesn't matter how much he's eaten during the day, at 5, he's ready to eat dinner. He may not eat a blasted thing, but come 5ish, he needs to be put in his chair and be given something. Sometimes, to take the pressure off of me while I'm cooking dinner, we'll put him in his chair and give him some fruit. His undeveloped toddler mind doesn't see this for the ruse that it is, he gets to eat "dinner" and everyone is happy. Again, it's the routine. Kids absolutely need routine, and shit, I can't blame them. If I learned as much in one day as he does, I'd be pretty happy to know that I don't have to worry about what's going down at bedtime.
Also, having a kid and dogs makes it nigh impossible to be spontaneous with things like travel, or outings past 7 PM, so routine becomes an eventuality. After all, how exactly would we break our routine? Go to Target before, instead of after lunch? Ooooooh, that's living. If I sound like I'm complaining, I can assure you I am not. I fear change like, well, like someone pathologically afraid of change. The routine is good. The routine is life.
That being said, I do find it necessary to spice things up now and again, and here's how I do it.
Video Games
Part of the reason I play games so much is that it provides me with a new opportunity for both stories and activities every few weeks. This year alone I've been a Persian Prince, a Splinter Cell, Riddick, a gladiator, a Thief, the list goes on. It doesn't matter what my day entails, or how much I can map it out with relative certainty, come game time, it's all new.
Music
When I buy a new cd, I'll fucking play it into the ground. Linda gets soooo sick of my music, because for weeks I'll play the same cd over and over and over in my car. I need to hear every part of the album, every part of the various songs before I get bored of it. It may not seem like a lot, but for around 12 bucks I can get hours of newness. Beat that!
Cooking
I do all of the cooking around the house. Partially because I love it, partially because I'm good at it and partially because I am the polar opposite of Linda in those past two instances. I have a shitload of cookbooks (most of them grilling and/or smoking) as well as a subscription to Cooking Light. By the way, The Complete Cooking Light Cookbook is, hands down, the best cookbook you can own. The recipes are easy, varied and quite healthy for you. Despite the "Light" in the title, they're really good too. If you only own one cookbook, I highly recommend this one. I also subscribe to the magazine, so between the cookbook's recipes which I've barely scratched the surface of, and the monthly influx of new recipes, I always have something new to make. Summer is grilling, winter is crockpots, spring and autumn fall somewhere inbetween. Having something new to make every week lets me learn something new about cooking (two summers ago was the summer of corn, Jesus did we eat well), make something interesting and give me new leftovers to eat over the week. Besides, when it's on, it's fucking on and you will not eat better than at my house. Believe that.
Reading
For as long as I can remember, I've been reading. Every night, despite how tired I may be, I can not fall asleep if I don't read first. Aside from being a chance to let my mind relax, it gives me some time, even if it's only 10 minutes, for myself. If I teach my kids anything, I hope it's an appreciation of reading. That and an ability to get a job, so that they're not sponging off of us for their adult lives. I can't imagine not having a book to read, hence my shelves and shelves of books that I haven't even touched yet. Fantasy novels that span 10 volumes, short stories that are only 5 pages long, crime fiction, horror fiction, noir fiction, I read it all.
Marital Arts
I've gotten a big kick over seeing how happy Phyxie is with being married. Fucking A, that's how it should be. Linda and I have been married for 8 years now, and in October will have been together for 13 years. All I can say, is that what we have now totally overshadows what we had when we first got married. It's fucking amazing. Ever since I can remember, we've traded off who gets up first in the morning. The lucky one gets to sleep in for an extra 10 minutes while the other one gets up, lets the dogs out and feeds them. Every morning that I have to get up, when I leave the room I kiss Linda and tell her that I love her. It doesn't matter how pissed off we may have been with each other the night before, or how much I'm dreading my day, I still do it, because every morning I need to tell her. I think that love helps turn routine into ritual, and ritual is sacred.
Anal Sex
OK, I've never had anal sex. I just had to throw that one in for Keggy.
The boy isn't much better. It doesn't matter how much he's eaten during the day, at 5, he's ready to eat dinner. He may not eat a blasted thing, but come 5ish, he needs to be put in his chair and be given something. Sometimes, to take the pressure off of me while I'm cooking dinner, we'll put him in his chair and give him some fruit. His undeveloped toddler mind doesn't see this for the ruse that it is, he gets to eat "dinner" and everyone is happy. Again, it's the routine. Kids absolutely need routine, and shit, I can't blame them. If I learned as much in one day as he does, I'd be pretty happy to know that I don't have to worry about what's going down at bedtime.
Also, having a kid and dogs makes it nigh impossible to be spontaneous with things like travel, or outings past 7 PM, so routine becomes an eventuality. After all, how exactly would we break our routine? Go to Target before, instead of after lunch? Ooooooh, that's living. If I sound like I'm complaining, I can assure you I am not. I fear change like, well, like someone pathologically afraid of change. The routine is good. The routine is life.
That being said, I do find it necessary to spice things up now and again, and here's how I do it.
Video Games
Part of the reason I play games so much is that it provides me with a new opportunity for both stories and activities every few weeks. This year alone I've been a Persian Prince, a Splinter Cell, Riddick, a gladiator, a Thief, the list goes on. It doesn't matter what my day entails, or how much I can map it out with relative certainty, come game time, it's all new.
Music
When I buy a new cd, I'll fucking play it into the ground. Linda gets soooo sick of my music, because for weeks I'll play the same cd over and over and over in my car. I need to hear every part of the album, every part of the various songs before I get bored of it. It may not seem like a lot, but for around 12 bucks I can get hours of newness. Beat that!
Cooking
I do all of the cooking around the house. Partially because I love it, partially because I'm good at it and partially because I am the polar opposite of Linda in those past two instances. I have a shitload of cookbooks (most of them grilling and/or smoking) as well as a subscription to Cooking Light. By the way, The Complete Cooking Light Cookbook is, hands down, the best cookbook you can own. The recipes are easy, varied and quite healthy for you. Despite the "Light" in the title, they're really good too. If you only own one cookbook, I highly recommend this one. I also subscribe to the magazine, so between the cookbook's recipes which I've barely scratched the surface of, and the monthly influx of new recipes, I always have something new to make. Summer is grilling, winter is crockpots, spring and autumn fall somewhere inbetween. Having something new to make every week lets me learn something new about cooking (two summers ago was the summer of corn, Jesus did we eat well), make something interesting and give me new leftovers to eat over the week. Besides, when it's on, it's fucking on and you will not eat better than at my house. Believe that.
Reading
For as long as I can remember, I've been reading. Every night, despite how tired I may be, I can not fall asleep if I don't read first. Aside from being a chance to let my mind relax, it gives me some time, even if it's only 10 minutes, for myself. If I teach my kids anything, I hope it's an appreciation of reading. That and an ability to get a job, so that they're not sponging off of us for their adult lives. I can't imagine not having a book to read, hence my shelves and shelves of books that I haven't even touched yet. Fantasy novels that span 10 volumes, short stories that are only 5 pages long, crime fiction, horror fiction, noir fiction, I read it all.
Marital Arts
I've gotten a big kick over seeing how happy Phyxie is with being married. Fucking A, that's how it should be. Linda and I have been married for 8 years now, and in October will have been together for 13 years. All I can say, is that what we have now totally overshadows what we had when we first got married. It's fucking amazing. Ever since I can remember, we've traded off who gets up first in the morning. The lucky one gets to sleep in for an extra 10 minutes while the other one gets up, lets the dogs out and feeds them. Every morning that I have to get up, when I leave the room I kiss Linda and tell her that I love her. It doesn't matter how pissed off we may have been with each other the night before, or how much I'm dreading my day, I still do it, because every morning I need to tell her. I think that love helps turn routine into ritual, and ritual is sacred.
Anal Sex
OK, I've never had anal sex. I just had to throw that one in for Keggy.
posted by Brandon at
9:02 PM
SubJoe,
It was weird to read your bit today as if I was going to write about breaking routine I would have included everything you would have minus the anal and marital arts. Like yourself I can't get enough of time to read. All I ask is for 20 minutes a night to read some text and I'm happy. Even better is the 30 minutes a night I get to try and make up a meal. I look at it as a challenge each night when given what my cupboard holds to be able to mesh a meal out of all the ingredients.
Cheers on a great article,
Keg/Pete
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